It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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