Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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