Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
