singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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