Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize