Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
