I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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