sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize