Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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