I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize