I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
