I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Randomize
