I wanna bring you to show and tell
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize