the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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