You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
