..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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