i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
