I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
