He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
