FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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