hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
