Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
