she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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