when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
