In the future we'll all be gay
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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