i just wanna soil my oats bro
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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