There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
