Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Randomize
