he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
