I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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