just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
