I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
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