I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Randomize
