You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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