So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
