party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
