I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
