i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Did I show you my penis last night?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Randomize
