I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
