ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
