Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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