I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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