watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
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