It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
