He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
