I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
