the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
It's never too late to be topless.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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