I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
We need to rekindle our bromance
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize