yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Randomize
