I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
