Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
In America we eat man semen.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
