And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
